Loss is never something we can fully prepare for. Recently, I said goodbye to a family member. I had imagined life without them, but when the moment came, I felt just as unprepared as if I’d never thought about it at all.
This experience of grief didn’t carry anger or fear; it was a profound sadness, accompanied by the emptiness left by someone who had brought joy, warmth, and laughter into the world. They had a way of making everything around them a bit brighter, and now there’s a silence in that space.
I’ve been reflecting on how our bodies carry the weight of emotions like grief, sadness, and love. At the funeral, I looked around and noticed it—shoulders drawn in, heads slightly bowed, a quiet heaviness. Our bodies seemed to instinctively create a kind of armour. Grief isn’t something that exists solely in our hearts or minds; it’s something we hold in our physical structure.
It’s fascinating how emotions have a way of shaping our physical presence. Grief can feel like an invisible weight, drawing shoulders down, creating a quiet heaviness. Happiness lifts us, creating an openness in our chest, while anxiety pulls everything inward, a tension in the jaw or a tightening around the eyes. These feelings aren’t confined to our minds; they settle in our bodies, leaving an unmistakable physical imprint.
Our thoughts and feelings are inseparable from our physical experiences. Every emotion leaves its own subtle mark, a trace in the body. Think of the small ways this happens: the slight tension that builds up when thinking about a task list, the tightening around the eyes as we try to remember a forgotten detail, the gentle tug of a happy memory that makes us smile. Each thought is accompanied by a physical response, like ripples on a lake.
Here’s something that’s been helping me during this time: taking a few seconds, whenever I remember, to pause and check in. I notice my breathing, my posture, any tension I might be holding. These simple moments of awareness allow me to soften, to let go, or simply to accept whatever I’m feeling without trying to change it.